FORGIVENESS THAT OVERCOMES HATE IN MARRIAGE

Résumé

The forgiveness of the other in a case where one is offended is neither a mechanical nor an easy exercise. It is a weighty but demanding and serious undertaking.345 This is true in almost every human relationship. It assumes a more serious dimension in a marital relationship where the one offended is physically and psychologically traumatized. Of all the questions asked during the last annual retreat of the laity in some dioceses East of the Niger, when a talk on the message of the Third Extraordinary Synod of Bishops on the family was presented to the faithful, the one on forgiveness in marriage featured most prominently. The questions were mostly about how difficult it is for husbands and wives to forgive each other when there is a crack in their marital relationship. In fact, these questions have eventually informed the choice of the topic for this essay especially as the Bishops’ message on the family, Part II, No.15, has it that through Christ’s reconciliation the period began by Moses, the period of hardness of heart, has ended and that marriage and the family have been restored to their original form (3rd ESOB, No.15). Consequently, this write-up considers forgiveness not merely a simple matter but a substantive issue which liberates the offended partner in the crisis of marriage as well as the one offending by relocating them back into God’s plan for marriage which is greater than sin and creates for them a new path in the human fragile love they have for each other.